So, Beyoncé flew over the audience on Friday night. I was a slightly slackjawed, as I’m a sucker for aerialics:

But, as with most things, I lost interest shortly thereafter. Lots of screaming, stretch pants, metallic tube dresses and Baby Phat shoes. It didn’t help that we arrived at 7pm, and she didn’t perform until after 8:30 (Opening act was some anonymous Pussycat-Dolls-meets-En-Vogue group called “Richgirl”). I was already drunk and over it by Ms. Knowles’ first number.

During “Single Ladies,” a cat fight broke out below us, complete with weave pulling and shirt ripping. If anything, I know my cue when to leave.

That’s one ugly costume, isn’t it?

As is this dress:

A bow? On her ass? WTF!

Obama would be pleased to know that he’s featured heavily in her concert — in nearly every video montage.

I’ve always loved that she sings live, but I think she sang only half the show live on Friday. Pity. However, she’s a knockout performer. Lots of energy. I think I’m just too old for this shit.